Showing up without the cringe

Do the words "social media" make your heart sink?

You know you “should” be more visible on social media.

You want to reach more clients so they can discover and benefit from what you do.

But it all feels too uncomfortable.

Inauthentic.

“Yuck.”

No wonder so many of us shrink from it.

But if we want to grow our businesses and help others find us, it's a part of the work.

You might wonder:

• How do I show up bravely without losing myself?

• How do I share my voice in ways that build genuine connections instead of just chasing likes and follows?

• How can I show up without cringing inside?

In one of our most popular Friday Firesides, Carlos and Laurence welcomed Kevan Smith.

He’s a visibility coach, videographer, content strategist, and founder of Brighton United. 

As a self-described introvert, Kevan shared practical ideas and insights into how purpose-led entrepreneurs, coaches, and solopreneurs can show up online without the dreaded "cringe."

He unpacked how to move past the discomfort to build genuine connections through content that serves rather than sells.

And how to release the tension you might feel about doing good work and letting others know about it.

Here are 9 takeaways from the conversation

1. Shift from self-promotion to sharing as service

Do you avoid sharing on social media because you feel it’s all about you? 

One of the most powerful mindset shifts you can make is to stop thinking about content as self-promotion.

Instead, focus on how you can provide value. As Kevan shares,

“I think the one key that will help anyone to be more confident with how they show up, is the mental reframe away from self-promotion and ‘How do I present myself?’

And shifting it to ‘How can I share information, insight, to something that's relevant in a way that it'll give the people watching an unlock, an idea of how to be more effective?’”

This simple new perspective can make showing up online feel so much easier and more authentic.

2. You don't need to be an expert, either

Another huge barrier for many of us?

Thinking that we need to be experts. 

For those hesitant to share their knowledge because they feel they don't know enough, Kevan offers this reassurance: you only need to be one step ahead of those you're helping to provide value.

3. Being introverted doesn't mean you can't show up

As an introvert himself, Kevan challenges the idea that you can't or don't want to be visible, too. He allows himself to be pulled by his “yearning or interest in sharing something that I think will help or connect.” 

The key difference here is the motivation—sharing to serve and connect rather than to receive attention.

And once you have visibility, you can use it to promote what’s meaningful to you.

4. Visibility amplifies your cause

The social causes we care about are often a reflection of our own experiences.

After noticing the lack of diversity at events, Kevan took to LinkedIn to share his frustration.

It wasn’t how he normally showed up on that platform, and people knew that “there must be something real in that experience.”

It became the catalyst for Brighton United, a city-wide initiative to increase Global Majority representation in coworking spaces and networking groups to help build professional relationships and collaborations.

It shows the power of building credibility online; it can become a platform for meaningful change when you need to speak up about important issues.

5. Help people to "Know, Like, Trust" you

Does planning your content feel overwhelming? Here’s a simple way to approach it.

Kevan outlined the content creation approach he uses with his clients, following the “Know, Like, Trust” framework:

• Know content: Simple, relatable content that introduces you

• Like content: Sharing your values and what you stand for

• Trust content: Offering solutions and establishing your expertise

Rather than trying to do everything in one post, work through these phases over a more manageable six months.

6. Don't be put off by low numbers

Many of us feel discouraged when our posts don't get any likes.

But platforms are designed to promote aspirational, sometimes inauthentic content, which is why genuine, values-led content might not go viral.

And that's perfectly okay.

“It doesn't matter if your post gets two likes. 

Your ideal customer's almost definitely not going to be one of the people engaging with your content. They're going to be lurking. 

They don't care if it has two likes.

They care because you're on their radar and they want to see what you have to say. 

If you keep it real and clear, and you do a good job of communicating the value and how you can be transformative for them, then you're successful without getting that engagement or those vanity metrics.”

7. Authentic doesn't mean unpolished

We can sometimes mistake being authentic with letting it all hang out. But how we present ourselves can help us communicate more effectively.

“I think about my content like my attire when I go to a networking event.

You want to come across clean and crisp, because that dissolves friction. It makes it easier for the message to land.

It's not about being swish or trying to position yourself as some kind of celebrity.”

Just as you'd dress appropriately for a networking event, your content should be presented in a way that removes the barriers to getting your message across.

8. Use voice notes to capture content ideas

Kevan shared his genius tip for gathering ideas for content: using a voice notes app.

“When you have a great conversation with someone about your work or your area of expertise, that is what you should be making content about.

Take a voice note and then put those transcripts into ChatGPT or Claude and make yourself a knowledge bank.”

This way you never run out of ideas, and the content you create will be based on what belongs to you.

9. It’s all about relationships

To put the social back in social media, see it as relationship building rather than marketing.

A place where you choose conversation over conversion and listening and holding space for others is key.

“Relationships only flourish and thrive when we're interested in other people; if we become great listeners and we hold space for people.

Then people come away with good vibes, and you grow a relationship.”

Many thanks to Kevan Smith for your time and the inspiration. You can find his work at Epiphany Content, connect with him on LinkedIn, and learn more about Brighton United.

Becoming visible is easier in a friendly environment.

Join like-minded founders, solopreneurs, and coaches and discover our Vision 20/20 small group coaching program, our Alptitude leader’s retreat, or our business retreat for hippies at Summercamp.